Category Archives: this is where shit gets deep

You plan. God laughs. Part II.

Ok, so it’s Saturday night-ish and I totally get that blogging on a Saturday is like, breaking a cardinal blogging rule. Or something. Word on the street is that people have better things to do than read blogs on a Saturday. But I don’t care, I’m going to post anyway. You know why? Because the mood has struck, and I’m all about blogging while I’m in the mood.  Not “the mood” though, because that’s really none of your business. Or my husband’s. Just kidding.


So I left you with this the other day:

It has absolutely occurred to me that my List is a plan of sorts. A way of creating a path to the things that are important to me. It has absolutely occurred to me that my plan could fail. But I happened to know that there is something more powerful, more intense, more gravitational, more deluxe, and more stupendous than a plan…


How could I do that? And then just leave with a picture of Turkey Bacon ‘n Eggs, just because I like it? Totally off-side. But you came back, and I’m glad you did. I can only hope you feel my answer was worth waiting for. Truth? it’s sort of become the corner-stone of my reinvention (I decided this last night, while drinking. Doesn’t matter). It’s my secret weapon for when [insert higher power here] decides to have at ‘er with my carefully-planned-planned-for plans. So, without further ado, the thing more mighty than a plan is…


In every failed plan – from the wrong entree, to the wrong job, to the wrong guy/girl, to the wrong opener to your book – there is an opportunity to:

-Test what you are really made of
-Learn how creative your are in the face of disaster or derailment
-Feel how resilient you are
-Use your optimism
-Understand, I mean really get, how badly you want that thing that didn’t go according to plan, because if you want it bad enough, you will find an opportunity to get it

I’m going to start taking my own advice.

Since turning 29 two months ago and beginning to check things off of my “Before I Turn 30 List”, I’ve taken a good look at my life. Here’s what I’ve found:

1. Overall, I have a good life. I’ve seen people who have what most would consider “a shitty life” and you know what? That’s not me. I need to start giving myself credit for the things I have accomplished – it’s the only way to truly know what it is to be successful.

2.Taking a good look at yourself isn’t easy, but it’s always necessary.

3. If you plan to make a List To Change Your Life, be prepared to ask yourself a lot of questions. And then be prepared for the answers. (Bring ice. Sometimes the truth hurts.)

4. I’ve never really failed at anything. That’s not good. Instead, I’ve quit a whole bunch of times and in the process totally short-changed my potential. I failed to see the opportunity at times and now, at 29, I understand that it is far better to fail and get the satisfaction of having had the experience than not trying at all.

5. Regrets = bad news. If you have regrets, chances are you’ve failed to see the opportunity in said situation. Again, I’ve learned this the hard way. Attention 20-somethings!

Opportunity is the thing that lies in between the cracks of failure.

Opportunity bridges the gap between your regrets and your lessons.

Opportunity is greater than the plan.

And [insert higher power here]’s got nothing on that.


Lisbon, Portugal. Just because.


Filed under Reinventing SandyB, Reinvention Inspiration, this is where shit gets deep

Signs are for windows… and comment boxes

Have you ever wanted – begged – for a sign?

The other day I treated myself to a little something that I posted about here. I fell in love with nothing special, really – just a sign in a window that spelled out exactly what I’d been thinking lately – “I LOVE YOU BLOGS.. AND COFFEE”

It was exactly what I needed.

The sign wasn’t cheap, but worth every penny, especially because the lady who sold it to me asked me an important question that I think was high time I answered: “So, what’s your blog about?”

And that was a million dollar question.

It’s written in black and white on my “About SandyB” page, so I know I’ve thought this out at least once before. And hell knows I talk about the effing blog to my sister and husband daily. They even have an ‘oh shit, are we talking about the blog again’ look.. but they always pull through with good advice, editing skills and sometimes they’re the ones who inspire these posts. I’m a lucky B.

But I didn’t start this blog to post at 6:00 a.m. and drink coffee, like I’m doing now.

Lately this blog has been enjoying readers. I didn’t ever think it would. When I started, I figured it would hit at least one person’s screen, and that was enough for me. If just one other reader, blogger, stalker stuck with me for the whole year until I finished my List, it was worth it. Not because my year-long project is for anyone else, but because I really do think the world is a stage, and sometimes we need someone other than ourselves to finish the performance for. Even if it’s just for an audience of one.

And the next thing I’m going to write might strike a chord (or ten) with some of you:

When you blog, who do you do it for?

It’s not a bad thing to do it for the entertainment of others. It’s not bad to want to connect with people who read you as you see yourself. And it’s not even bad if all you want is a place to park your thoughts – the stuff you can’t say at the office, in your house or while you’re buying signs about blogs and coffee. As long as you know why you blog, as long as you have a reason, then it’s worth it every time.

And since this is so obviously not the kind of post where I swear excessively, make fun of my life or put on my wedding dress, I guess it would be a good time to tell you that I was hoping my blog would be more than just about my List. I just wasn’t sure what I wanted that something to be.

And then, in my comment box, I got another sign from someone who’s Not That Kind of Girl.

“I take it you’ve also been working on the longer-term ones — like, the ones that aren’t a one-shot that you can cross off right away? It would be cool at some point to read a status update of how you’re changing for the better, or if anything hasn’t been as worthwhile as you hoped.”

Since I first hit publish not so long ago, there is one thing I’ve learned that I know will stick with me for a long time, maybe even forever..

I’d rather meaningfully reach one person than casually stir a million. And I’m over the moon today if that one person is you.

“I believe that one defines oneself by reinvention. To not be like your parents. To not be like your friends. To be yourself. To cut yourself out of stone.”

-Henry Rollins


Filed under Reinvention Inspiration, this is where shit gets deep